I've had a very hard last few days friends. Our technical problems at The MOB Society are driving me batty (BATTY I say!) and I sat at my breakfast table this morning totally overwhelmed by my lack of ability to do anything about it. (There are people working on it, never you fear, it's just a slow process). I poured out my heart to a few close friends, and asked them to show up with dark chocolate, fresh bread, or Prozac...you know...whichever they had handy...all things I thought might ease my immediate discomfort and bring some peace to my weary heart.
Then I poured out my heart to God, praying my old, familiar, go-to prayer, "Lord, I believe! Help my unbelief!" (from Mark 9:24), and did my best to choose to believe He heard me. I asked Him to provide, to protect, to heal, and to guide.
Thankfully, God knew what I really needed.
a fresh wind of faith
Early in the day, we were invited to spend the morning hanging out with our church's backpack ministry. Some local VA State Troopers were scheduled to be there doing drug dog and TAC-team demonstrations, and I knew our boys would love it.
After the demos, we all went into the sanctuary and had an opportunity to listen to one of the Troopers talk about being on the TAC-team (all I have to say is thank GOD for our protectors...really...next time you see one thank them for all they go through to keep you safe) and then ask their own questions, but the best part, the part this mama needed so much, came at the end.
Three children came to the front of the sanctuary, laid hands on the Troopers who knelt before them, and prayed over them. My youngest was one of them.
His prayer was the most precious thing I have ever heard, and I stood there weeping as I realized that God was giving me exactly what I needed most that day, assurance that the hearts of my sons, and yours too, are safe in His capable hands.
There was no prodding on my part to get my little guy to pray. We hadn't discussed it beforehand, and he certainly wasn't just having an "on" day. In fact, he'd been in trouble all morning (OK...all week). But in spite of his behavior on the outside, there is a glowing fire of tenderness toward prayer, and a heart that really wants to be good even when it's so much easier to be bad. I saw it today...and it was good.
Dark chocolate, fresh bread, Prozac, and even coffee are all good, but there's no refreshment on earth that can blow a fresh wind of faith and courage into a mama's heart like seeing God use her children to bless others. It was a direct answer to prayer, evidence of a God who sees and hears His children's pleas for help.
"The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul." Psalm 23:1-3.
Most often, we want God to swoop down and just fix everything that's ailing us. And the truth of the matter is that He can. The God of the universe is fully capable of a snap of a finger, or a blink of an eye that would turn our worlds upside down, bringing us everything we've ever prayed for. But that doesn't happen very often. Why? Because this God who loves us with a love so deep we can only begin to understand it prefers to get in our messes with us, and lead us into a deeper relationship with Him in the process.
That's the definition of new mercies every day. That's the way He meets us in our mess. That's the way we can experience God's faithfulness in the tiny minutes of each day. Not that He should swoop down and change it all, but that we should simply offer Him what faith we have, and beg Him to help it grow. He will.
I'd love to know friends, how has God restored your soul this week? Met you in your mess? (If you're reading via email, click over to join in the comments!)